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Friends, "The One with the Breast Milk": Will people stop drinking the breast milk?

My review/recap of the September 28, 1995 episode after I take my grandmother to the vet.

Friends, "The One with Ross's New Girlfriend": What the hell happened to you in China?

My review/recap of the September 21, 1995, second season premiere after a chicken poops in my lap.

The Sopranos, "Big Girls Don't Cry": That's the new pecking order

My review/recap of the February 13, 2000 after I crack my head open on a cigarette machine.

Friends, "The One Where Rachel Finds Out": Give us a chance

My recap/review of the May 18, 1995, Season 1 season finale after I rub my head to turn back time.

Breaking Bad, "Open House": That's not who we are

My review/recap of last night's episode after I get peas and ice.

Curb Your Enthusiasm, "The Smiley Face": You never give up a cabinet

My review/recap of last night's episode after I play "Danny Boy" on my flute.

Falling Skies, "What Hides Beneath": We're taking the fight to them

My review/recap of last night's episode after I pad my stats for jumping rope.

Entourage, "Out with a Bang": I deserve good things

My review/recap of last night's episode after I totes kid you about LeBron winking at your girlfriend.

The Sopranos, "Commendatori": I felt right at home

My review/recap of the February 6, 2000 episode after I hit the topless beaches and see that crater.

Friends, "The One with the Birth": Good thing we're in a hospital

My review/recap of the May 11, 1995 episode after I celebrate Lesbian Lover Day.

The Sopranos, "Toodle Fucking-Oo": There has to be consequences

My review/recap of the January 30, 2000 episode after I try doorknobs until I hit the jackpot.

Friends, "The One with the Ick Factor": Rob that cradle

My review/recap of the May 4, 1995 episode after I ask who the most powerful Power Ranger is.

The Sopranos, "Do Not Resuscitate": You let it go

My review/recap of the January 23, 2000 episode after I drive by Jimi Hendrix's house in Seattle.

Friends, "The One with the Fake Monica": You know there's already a "Joseph Stalin"?

My review/recap of the April 27, 1995 episode after I take off my clothes and have a nightmare.

The Sopranos, "Guy Walks Into a Psychiatrist's Office...": We'll make a family reunion out of it

My review/recap of the January 16, 2000, second season premiere episode after I exercise more impulse control.

Friends, "The One with the Evil Orthodontist": Just leave her the message already

My review/recap of the April 6, 1995 episode after I cook toast or oatmeal naked.

Friends, "The One Where the Monkey Gets Away": How could you lose him?

My review/recap of the March 9, 1995 episode after I master the difference between "Bring me the..." and "Pee in the... ."

The Sopranos, "I Dream of Jeannie Cusamano": These people have no love or compassion

My review/recap of the April 4, 1999 first season finale after I learn some coping skills.

Friends, "The One with All the Poker": It should be that simple

My review/recap of the March 2, 1999 episode after I throw away two Jacks because they didn't look happy.

Friends, "The One with Two Parts": Um yeah, twin thing

My review/recap of the February 23, 1995 hour-long episode after I don't think scrunchie is a word.

Breaking Bad, "Thirty-Eight Snub": One day at a time

My review/recap of last night's episode after I turn into a sleestak.

Entourage, "Home Sweet Home": How long do you want to keeping going on like this?

My review/recap of last night's eighth (and final) season premiere after I don't want a throat lozenges in this house.

Falling Skies, "Sanctuary Part 2": The world's coming apart

My review/recap of last night's episode after I think about buying in this neighborhood.

The Sopranos, "Isabella": Talk about a jolt to the system

My review/recap of the March 28, 1999 episode after I have some Mormons over for dinner.

The Sopranos, "Nobody Knows Anything": A secret is a heavy load

My review/recap of the March 21, 1999 episode after I suppose I should've just kept my mouth shut, like a mute.

The Sopranos, "A Hit is a Hit": There's business to be done

My review/recap of the March 14, 1999 episode after I use a ukulele.

Trailer Reviews: An unoriginal and a straight-to-DVD

My review of two trailers for upcoming movies after I really start to cut in to your vacation time.

Friends, "The One with the Stoned Guy": What a tool

My review/recap of the February 16, 1995 episode after I have to make macaroni and cheese.

Friends, "The One with the Candy Hearts": It's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day

My review/recap of the February 9, 1995 episode after I try to let go of the anger and learn to love myself.

Friends, "The One with the Boobies": It's a wacky world

My review/recap of the January 19, 1995 episode after I play a big game of Kerplunk.

The Sopranos, "Boca": Why the big secret?

My review/recap of the March 7, 1999 episode after I yap worse than six barbers.

Friends, "The One with the Dozen Lasagnas": You're like the anti-Paolo

 
My review/recap of the January 12, 1995 episode after I could be on the Olympic "stand there" team.

The Sopranos, "The Legend of Tennessee Moltisanti": Where's my arc?

My review/recap of the February 28, 1999 episode after I get high off of the that candy and carpet smell in Blockbuster.

Friends, "The One with Mrs. Bing": She's not a regular mom

My review/recap of the January 5, 1995 episode after I practice a Greek play.

The Sopranos, "Down Neck": I'm glad if he's proud of me

A review/recap of the February 21, 1999 episode after I sell patio furniture in San Diego.

The Sopranos, "Pax Soprana": Is everybody in my life bananas or what?

A review/recap of the February 14, 1999 episode after I play shortstop for the Mets.

Friends, "The One with the Monkey": I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday

My review/recap of the December 15, 1994 episode after I juggle balled-up socks.

Friends, "The One Where Underdog Gets Away": It's like a tradition

My review/recap of the November 17, 1994 episode after I pick paleontology as a major on a dare.

Breaking Bad, "Box Cutter": I don't consider him a professional

My review/recap of last night's season premiere after I bid on a new mineral. 

Falling Skies, "Sanctuary Part 1": It's the wild west out there

A review/recap of last night's episode after I do 102 push-ups without breaking a sweat.

Friends, "The One Where Nana Dies Twice": You have a quality

A recap/review of the November 10, 1994 episode after I steal Sweet'n'Low's from restaurants and the house.

Trying to breakdown what is the best show (Breaking Bad is not number 1)

My thoughts on where Breaking Bad places all-time (or at least my lifetime), in anticipation of the fourth season premiere on Sunday, after I admit to myself that I may have a problem with television.

Friends, "The One with the Black Out": It's never going to happen

A review/recap of the November 3, 1994 episode after I'm always the last to know.

The Sopranos, “College”: Shall we talk about your future?

A review/recap of the incredible February 7, 1999 episode after I find $50,000 in Krugerrands and a .45 automatic while hunting for Easter eggs.

Friends, "The One with the Butt": I play Al Pacino's butt

A review/recap of the October 27, 1994 episode after I rode the subway all the way to Brooklyn just for the hell of it.

The Sopranos, "Meadowlands": Focus through distractions

A review/recap of the January 31, 1999 episode after I heard the nurses said you made number two in your pants.

Friends, "The One with the East German Laundry Detergent": Have a good break-up

A review/recap of the October 20, 1994 episode after I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor.